Tuesday, 30 December 2008


So I am back to work today after a long five and a half days break... long but not enough definitely.. I have to work another day before I go on a four days break.. I really don't see any point in working these two days.. anyway, since my boss insisted, here I am doing everything else but work! *grin*

I believe a lil makeover is necessary now and then to make life more interesting... (at least to keep me going) So, I just gave this blog a new look.. it wasn't as easy as I thought it would be, since it is not a standard template and I had to manipulate some coding.. Margie would have done a better job in this, but being the freak I am, I always had a thing for programming, so I kinda enjoyed it :)

And of course, I'm planning on a small makeover for myself too.. only if the banks would stop sending me exclusively written letters, I would have considered a new wardrobe.. now that is out of the question.. So I am thinking of a hair makeover... I haven't decided what I want to do, but constant reminders of friends and family to not cut it short like I did last time still running through my head.. My hair is really really long now.. the longest I have ever had... as much as I want to keep it long, I also feel it looks so blah!

The best option would be to curl or color it.. and again both needs MONEY! lots of it.. and curling would require lot of care and attention for which I have no time.. the last option remains as to cut it short.. to which I am contemplating.. lets see, if my adrenalin pushes me to do it.. I have less than 48 hours left to decide as I need a new look before the new year...

I wish my friends are around now to give their two cents worth... Margie is currently going through a miserable holiday back in India.. Poor gal.. And our new engaged women, Anya! is floating on cloud 9 planning her coming soon- wedding!! Did I tell u all that she has a shiny rock on her fingers already? Lucky lucky gal ;)

By: 'lilo

Monday, 22 December 2008


Compiling a list of things I achieved this year...

1. Started this blog! Halleluiah!

2. Changed jobs... (From a shit hole to an ass hole :p both equally sucks!)

3. Got promoted :) (which led to dealing with some weird creatures!)

4. Went on my first self paid trip to CAMBODIA!! (aaaww, it was awesome ;) need another next

5. Bought a brand new car!!! My first investment!! Luv my car… :)

6. Got rid of a bitch from my life.. Finally!!

7. Opened account in almost every well known bank in Malaysia! (No kidding, now I have accounts in CIMB, Maybank, Standard Chartered, HSBC, OCBC, Public Bank & Ambank)

8. Attended one of the sweetest weddings of the year! P & V’s..

9. Cleared one Credit Card! Many more to go :)

10. Made two new friends!! (the only 2, who has the privilege to read n comment on this blog :p)

11. Joined GYM :D

12. hmmm… running out of ideas already.. Does starting a FB account count? ;)

By: ‘lilo

Thursday, 18 December 2008


The year is coming to an end.. while counting the few remaining days, I have been just thinking through of my life this year.. all my days of the year were either spent at work, working for/with someone else, or else, constantly trying to please others, social obligations, etc etc..

...feeling very empty inside...

undeniably, i have had some good times with my friends, made some new friends and lost some old friends.. have made some progress in my career and have also had my share of working pain with some weird creatures..

somehow, i am still feeling very empty inside.. don't feel like i have achieved anything.. its a real weird feeling that I have so many people around me yet I feel so lonely... its a weird feeling that I work so hard but everything turns out to be just doing my job.. its so weird that I sacrifice so many things yet no one appreciates it..

sigh... is every year gonna be the same?

By:'lilo (still)

Wednesday, 17 December 2008


Anya has been too busy lately being busy to moan/complain/bitch about her busy life. But thinking about it, most of the busy-ness was good busy-ness so I guess that's good. (Uhhh duhhh ~~) . That's a lame conclusion but hey, that's to be expected since it's way to early in the morning to be thinking logically.

So anyway, last night Anya was thinking about some of the weird things that happened recently - the kind of things that all you can do is laugh. As Shakespeare said, life is a stage and we are all its actors... and here are the bloopers:

#3 Anya was feeling on the verge of falling sick one Friday - sorethroat, flu, slightly feverish and that sick taste in the mouth. But she had a lunch date with a good friend. So she decided to meet her friend for lunch and than go home, take some medicines and sleep. During lunch, everything felt so hazy and at one point, while her friend was telling her something (can't remember if it was interesting or not), [Anya used to think this only happens in America's Funniest Home videos!] : Anya fell asleep!

#2 Anya's brother was hungry late one night but was too lazy to go out and get a burger or something to eat. So being the kind (*ehem*) big sister, Anya volunteered to make pancakes. Anya's brother was a bit suspicious because he's been tricked many times into thinking Anya knows what she's talking about or doing (*winks*). Only after mixing the batter, Anya turns to her brother and says "This is the first time I'm making pancakes". Needless to say, the pancakes turned out to be a disaster - they looked like a glob of overcooked oatmeal mush [they tasted nice though...really, they did!]. Anya thinks next time her brother will go for that burger no matter what;)

And the mother of all bloopers....

#1 Anya was on work assignment to Zambia. And what's a trip to Zambia without visiting the Victoria Falls (the largest curtain of water in the world). This was the picture in Anya's mind that kept her excited while she endured the incredibly long journey(8 hour bus ride, the last quarter of it felt like an off-road adventure) :

But this is what she saw when she got to the Mosi-O-Tunya National Park:

Victoria Falls during the draught!


Tuesday, 16 December 2008


okay, i have finally realised that my nick for this blog LILO sounds really stupid.. to think bout it, it doesn't suit me at all.. i'm so not the cute charming gal.. the only resemblance i would have to the real Lilo would be, I always like stitch-kind-of guys.. if you are wondering who they are, they are the monstrous, real jerk types... yes, somehow i do like them..

anyway, back to my point.. i need to get a better nick to blog.. with my birthday around the corner, i realise i'm catching up on age.. n a 27 years old Lilo so doesn't click :p oh fuck, i never thought i would one day say i'm 27... seriously, that is the most sucking feeling one could ever have...

so i'm on a mission now to find a new nick.. (something more matured, bitchy, negative, angry or anything else i could be at this point of time) please suggest if you can think of something..

By: 'lilo

Thursday, 4 December 2008


One rainy day, a mother went to pick up her girl from school, thinking that the girl will fear the lightening. On the way, she found her child smiling at the sky for every lightening. She asked her why she smiled. The little girl said “God is taking my photo, so I have to look good. That’s why I smiled.” So smile when problems threaten you and don’t fear anything for God is always with you.

Whoever who thought that was “aaaw, so sweet” please do not continue reading. Cause all I had to say was WTF??! Seriously..

I received a text message on that this morning. (I’m sure my friends would have got it too, coming from another annoying friend :p) I’m just so sick of all these quotes and books on being positive, good and shit. What is life if you don’t fear about something? What is life if you have to avoid all problems?

Fear the fear! And move on.. Face the problem! And move on.. Don’t fucking avoid it..

For god’s sake, stop living in D.E.N.I.A.L!

By: 'lilo

Wednesday, 3 December 2008

i heart this week!

one of the days when i feel blessed :D

1. Have just celebrated one of my best buddy's wedding on Sunday.. it was such a happy feeling to be present that day...in the 567,255 weddings i've been to, this was one of the most romantic and nicest wedding and one that i could actually relate to... the rest of the weddings are usually cousins or worse, parent's friends' children which i dont even know or care much for :P

** apart from my horrible, sucky speech and losing my hp pouch (its a big deal coz apparently Nokia doesn't sell the pouch on its own !! :( , the wedding was a brilliant reunion cum massive gossipin session for moi :D )

Oh and P's speech about his wife.. sigh.. some day, i hope i meet a guy who will love me as much as P does to his wife.. (my pessimist side tells me "that is never gonna happen") hah!

2. I have not worked much since Monday and yesterday :P

Being awfully sick with flu yesterday, i met this one lady manager whom i rarely chat with but have helped her with some support isssues before... We bumped in the loo and while both of us were peeing in the next cubicles, she says "hey dear come to my desk and take the vitamin C.. it will help with your flu... "

i said okay.. but being me, i forgot all bout it..And so today morning she meets me and tells me again.. and we rarely speak exp when its work related which is also rare as she is in different department and different level.

I dont know about others, but to me small kind gestures like this esp by strangers really touch me :P

3. Last night after yoga, met up with my aussie cousins and we all, the malaysian cousins on my mum's side and them went for our favourite roadside hawker restaurant and had a blast.. 3 rules applied for the dinner outing:

a) Not to touch stray dogs --> this was because the last time we went this place, i had to touch a dog which nearly bit my wrist off :P

b) for our aussie cousin A, not to drink the HUGE iced milo glass (even tho its absolutely delicious) --> coz he puked soon after the last time.. who wouldnt puke if u drank 2 huge MILO glasses and mango juice in between? hehe

c) cousin J cannot drive (coz he nearly ran over a brick wall) :P

And last night we had a blast...i didn't touch any dogs, and cousin A didn't order that drink but we had incidents of flyin cockroach hovering on our table which resulted in all of us screaming and other tables staring at us, prolly muttering "loony bangalis"

Its moments like these and many others that i love to reminisce about... There are days when i wish i was far away from here but when i think about all the various activities i have with both my paternal and maternal side of families i tell myself, am i willing to let all this go?

Family ties are important in anyone's life.. i know many people who dont speak to 'this relative' and 'that relative' etc. I am lucky that in my family, both sides are talking to each other and are not having any major issues... i know in the early years of my life, there were many problems but im glad, with time and everyone getting wiser all that is healed...

People come and go, shit happens etc. I do hope though, foolish as it might be, that no untoward incidents happen to any of my family members be it close or distant...

-M, who just got back from lunch with 5 cousins + 1


Thursday, 27 November 2008

World in two pieces?

While catching up on my ever growing age, I have realized that I would be meeting and dealing with all sorts of people and especially weird ones being a well known psycho magnet.

Anyway, I had this crazy idea of breaking up the world into two; basically dividing the human being to only two types. (This is purely in the name of fun, so do not continue reading if you are looking forward for something realistic. It may be really stupid, but I believe u will stop a moment to think!)

And the nominations are:

  1. Those who hate cats and those who don’t
  2. Those who can sleep naked and those who can’t
  3. Those who have face book and those who don’t
  4. Those who eat durians and those who don’t
  5. Those who can go to the toilet with the doors open and those who must close the door (even if they live all alone)
  6. Those who rushed to watch Titanic and those who didn’t
  7. Those who laugh at Mr. Bean and those who don’t
  8. Those who like beer and those who don’t
  9. Those who brush teeth b4 sleeping and those who don't
  10. Those who MUST wash hand b4 eating and those who don't care

Ok, that’s all my creative brain can think for now. This list is here to grow. So feel free to suggest and I shall leave the winner to you guys too… So do vote for either one from the list if you thought the above were stupidly creative =)

By: ‘lilo

Wednesday, 19 November 2008


(I’ve been itching to blog the past two days.. to write n let out my life miseries.. I’ve been going thru the shittiest moments of my life n walking around like zombie.. then I decided I dun even wanna capture those moments into words to be reminded of it one day! :p)

I am in a very good mood today… god knows y.. but I think its more like, I choose to be happy today… n I’m wearing my newest clothes ;) extra make up.. hahaha… (whoever said shopping is sinful should be stoned to death!)

Anyway, I may not have everything I want right now.. or maybe everything would not turn out the way I want it to be.. n my life can keep getting more n more complicated… but somehow I believe, I am still blessed…

I was having this conversation with one of my dearest friend yest.. he’s just one of those very positive ones, who always makes me see the silver lining in the grey cloud (but honestly, I have never even seen one in my whole life.. maybe I never had the time to stop and admire the clouds :p)

Yeah, so when I was talking to him or more like complaining bout my life to him, eventually I got into his positive aura and said, I really hope I’ll see the light at the end of the tunnel one day.. But to my surprise, he replied, you have to follow the right path in the tunnel to be able to see the light, lilo(even, he was no longer positive after listening to my stories.. hahaha!)

Of course I argued to him, the tunnel is so dark, and I can’t see where I am heading… and I’m getting lost..

But this morning (note:after putting on new clothes) and driving to work.. I realized.. The tunnel may be dark.. it is in fact… But I’m glad, I have real great friends who are either lost in the same tunnel with me or they are there to listen to my cryings and guide me to follow the right path out of it.. And I’m also glad I have a boy friend who’s holding my hand and leading me out of the tunnel…

I must be blessed, no? =)

By: ‘lilo

Wednesday, 12 November 2008

Don't ask me!

Yes, I’m called a psycho magnet for a reason :p (my friends call me that, and after years of arguing, I agree now)

Anyway, I have this one new “junior” whom I’m supervising currently. She’s undeniably smart, sweet, and pretty and everything else she claims to be. That’s beside the point. She’s just one of those people who get into my nerves at times. She has this annoying habit of asking questions. I mean seriously a lot of questions. Everyday and every time!!

I do agree when you are new somewhere, you have to ask questions in order to learn better. However, I also believe you don’t have to ask everything. Some things are just plain common sense and for everything else there’s something called GOOGLE!!! (google it up bitch! That’s the sentence constantly running on my mind recently cause I clearly know she does not have something called common sense :p)

I really don’t think I’m exaggerating here. For an example, my office clock is 10minutes faster, and it’s placed high up in the wall, so no one bothers to change it. So she starts:

A: Lilo, what’s the time now?
L: (staring at the clock right in front of our eyes, and her shiny watch) answers its 9.30

A: the clock is running fast right?
L: yeah (duh!)

A: is it exactly 10mins faster?
L: YES! (With a stare now)

A: I just want to know, if the clock is running faster for a reason?
L: There’s no (fuckin) reason! It’s just high up in the wall, so no one changes it.

A: Do you think I should clarify this with the bosses?
L: at this point, I just become speechless (although, my heart is screaming, just shut the fuck up n do ur work!!)

Just one more example. She was complaining that she could not find some phone numbers. So I told her, I’ll get her the phone directory and I did. And she asks

A: Thanks. What is this?
L: directory!

A: (still holding the book) oh, can I get all the phone numbers here?
L: yes! (duh!)

(btw, the directory is called Schroeder’s International Business Directory)

A: (still haven’t open the book) what about Singapore numbers??
L: yes, why don’t you open it up n see?

A: Can I also find Indonesian numbers??
L: (just stared!!!)

A: Just one last question, why is this directory called Schroeder’s???
L: (seriously, do I still answer her??)

Some people just never fail to amaze me. Sigh….
(I hope “my friend” now knows why am I all mean n rude suddenly! or maybe not suddenly :p)

By: ‘lilo

Tuesday, 11 November 2008

the day my horoscope was actualy precise to a T ...

I needed a break, so i decided to surf for a while (even though i barely have the time but i so darn need to breakaway from work for a while..)

[Trust me working 11 hours daily, including some parts of the weekend is so NOT nice :S]

And i saw this on Yahoo Horoscopes:

You're on the line all day long -- maybe calling, maybe emailing but certainly communicating with a fairly wide range of people. Your energy is just right for spreading the word about your latest project.

It is one of the truest and most specific it can get for me.. :)

I have been emailing and sending out bulletins to users regarding my project today... So spooky :D

Footnote: i know, i know.. this is so irrelevant but didn't i mention im on a break...hence the short entry and some email checking... :P


Monday, 10 November 2008

Dial M for Marriage $#%^&^!!

Reason i blogged today is because i was completely taken aback by an impromptu call by my Mother just few minutes ago.. another M word.. hmm, ironic :P

So she calls up and the conversation goes on something like this:

Mom: ******, are you busy?
Margie: Not really.. wrapping things up.. why?
i was thinking she either wanted to scold me somemore on behalf of her darling daughter (my elder sister) or remind me about something..

Mom: So listen, your dad just called and he asked to ask you... there is this guy, working in California.. you want to meet?

Margie: For what?
Mom: For marriage lah! Some more for what :P

Margie: Why ask me? Go ask ***** (elder unmarried sister rotting in the house)
Mom: Coz she doesn't want to go overseas.
Why of course, she loves being my mom's darling pet too much :P

Mom: and since you always like going overseas, i thought you would be interested...
And Margie thinks, shit! how did she get the wind of my master P***

Margie: No mom, im not interested. If i want to go overseas, i'll go on my own.. i dont need to get married for that.

Mom: But he is down here.. Your dad thought you could meet up...
Margie: No. Im sure he is crop anyway..i want turbaned half German half Sikh guy.

Mom: Oh well.. where am i gonna find you a turbaned guy these days :(
Margie: Don't worry. I'll find myself, thank you.

End of conversation.

I felt bad.. but i had no choice.

Just yesterday, Margie and Lilo went to Snowflake's brothers wedding.. along the looooong journey to/fro, we discussed at LENGTH on M.A.R.R.I.A.G.E and M.O.T.H.E.R.S and annoying S.I.B.L.I.N.G.S...

In the end, we just felt depressed :P But a quick pit stop to a dear, hugely missed friend of ours back from Uni cheered us up... We miss you a lot Chu!!!! I long for the days when we used to lie down on the throw cushions and just yak and Chu will massage our hair or soothe us just by listening.. Sigh..

Ah well..

So Margie thinks her clock has started ticking.. :(
How is she gonna sustain 1X months more?? :(


Friday, 7 November 2008

little momets...

I received a forward mail this morning on things that makes u smile.. i have received this sort of mails like hundred times before... u know those that says old couple holding hands, smell of grass, birds chirping in your ears, etc etc... yeah, they are all sweet but i don't really find them practical.. or at least those are not the things that i treasure..

so, i decided to come up with my very own list.. some of them might sound real lame.. but just compiling for the fun of it..

here it goes... below are things that makes me smile or little moments that i treasure or just some things that I really appreciate...

1. when my shoe or sandal breaks or tears off... (i don't need a better reason to get a new one, do i? ;) )

2. the little mirror in my car's sun shield panel on the drivers side! (i think cars without one, discriminates women :p)

3. the trying my new clothes moment, right after i reach home after shopping!! (even if its late at night)

4. the feeling right after shaving/waxing legs... (which only lasts for a day :p)

5. when my boss takes off on a friday!

6. the rare moment when i eat Baskin Robins without feeling guilty!!

7. when my weighing scale shows lesser than what it ALWAYS does!! (even if its faulty :p )

8. zero outstanding balance on my credit card statement! (i keep checking daily, in case if they decide to charge me for not using the card! tat wud give me a reason to.., ok i shall shut up!)

9. a cute yummy guy on a gal's day/nite out ;)

10. when someone asks me if im still studying! ( i wish :p)

11. when something good finally happens to Meredith in grey's anatomy...

last but not least..

12. when there's a new comment for my blog entry! ;) haha...

by: 'lilo

Wednesday, 22 October 2008

Expectations (II)..

Without being a relationship guru and advising what and what not to do, I just wanna share the lilo way of dealing with this ;) ^evil grin^

It might be the easy way out, but its as simple as this: just DON”T HAVE ANY EXPECTATIONS. If you happen to get, it’s a bonus, celebrate! If you don’t get, tap your shoulder n be proud that u weren’t expecting anyway! ;)

For an example, I think we all should practice saying some mantras in our heads.

i. Men are dumb!

(With all due respect to men readers, I don’t mean to degrade u and I really don’t blame u. I truly believe god made u that way for a reason. I must confess, I’m always attracted to men and cannot live without them. And there are even two theories two prove my point, opposites attract and the concept of Yin & Yang. There might be some men who are exceptionally smart, but I’m not talking about them here, because I’m smart enough not to be attracted to them :) )

When I constantly say this mantra in my head, I feel myself sailing through in relationships that I used to suffer a lot. When I know for a fact men are made dumb how could I have the heart to be mad at them right? That would make me stupid, isn’t it?

ii. aaaaah, motherssss…..

I believe a mother’s job description includes nagging as one of the key tasks. So all they are doing is trying hard to achieve their KPIs. So we can’t really blame them, can we? So, lilo just says, aaaaahhhh motherssss….

iii. Bosses suck!

They are merely being paid to question our capabilities. They are required to not agree with us the 1st time. Again, they are meant to suck. So, why bother?

Come on, be creative. Add to the list yourself. I think the smartest move for me to do is to shut up now :)

By: ’lilo

Expectations (I)..

Yesterday I was reading an article, when I realized, most of the time we are not happy because things didn’t turn out as how we expected it to be. Well, I do know it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to guess that. Nevertheless, I personally think there’s a huge difference between having a goal to achieve and having an expectation of how the result should be. Because failing to do the first, only makes me strong to try harder, meanwhile the second makes me sad and all miserable. And the second one is what I’m talking about.

Although this applies in every matter of life, but it hurts more when dealing with relationships. Most of the time, we have an imaginary role planned in our head of how the other person should be, be it our parents, siblings, friends, partners, co-workers and even bosses. When the other person fails to fit into our imaginary role, most of the time, we find them to be disappointing, and we end up being miserable.

Blame it on the fairy tales, movies, tv series, story books or even those few-lucky-irritating people that we happen to bump into in our lives. However, reality is, those imaginary roles rarely exist. No one said the world is fair.

I think the key to this is to stop EXPECTING someone to change to fit into 'the role' and believe that everyone is different n it is up to us to accept the other person as the way they are. This might takes a little sacrifice from our side, our policies, pride to a certain extend. However, if I were to die tomorrow, I would rather die being happy.

For practicing this, some people choose to say, I have no self-respect or self-love. But I choose to think, if it’s me, who's sacrificing my policies and tolerating the person's nonsense, I am definitely better than him/her!

By: 'lilo

Tuesday, 21 October 2008

When beauty isn't enough ....

Beauty or brains? I think its the beauty that attracts in the first place but the brains/personality make the difference between staying and leaving. But what if you're like most people who may have a great personality but don't have the looks to match. It doesn't take a genius to guess you might not be getting as much attention from the opposite sex as you like. And you can't blame them can you, because you do the same to them;)

I remember during my university days, there was this guy that looked like a Greek God to us. I'm sure we all had a crush on him, some more serious than others- well except the ones with bad taste in men, were blind or lesbians. Lilo and myself used to practicaly drool over him but from a distance of course - we were too snobbish to make the first move and go talk to him. Anyway, we didn't need to because Lilo, being quite a looker herself (I know you're going to kill me for saying this, but accept the fact:P) soon attracted his attention and both of them became friends. Well I'm sure Mr. Hunky Greek God was hoping to be more than friends but sadly, his good looks just didn't match his personality. We demoted him from Mr. Hunky Greek God to Mr. Cheap & Transparent.

Than there was another guy in university, he was probably one of the first guys me and my friends talked to. He was quite good looking I suppose and there were some girls with wild crushes on him. He seemed like a real catch at the begining but it didn't take long for us to label him as Mr. Vain. There's even a song that describes him so well - "You don't impress me much" by Shania Twain.

Of course there were also those guys with looks as bad as their personality, and vice versa. In fact, we had more of those than we'd like. In the interest of giving them the benefit of the doubt, we attempted to be their friends but nah-ah, that went down rather badly. There was a mousy looking guy that thought he could impress me by bragging about the days he used to steal from the grocery shop he worked part time at. What a turn off! Another who showed Lilo his SPM results certificate and gave her a blue rose thinking that would impress her, hoping to win her heart and conviniently forgetting he had a girlfriend. Like, what the ??

So, for me, beauty or brains? Brains definitely comes out tops but I also need to be able to look at you everyday without thinking, "yikes, what did the cat drag in this time??"


Once in my life time...

and yeah, after reading the last blog, I'm expecting a lot of advises from people... not that i don't appreciate any of them, but I think I deserve a break.. and to record, I listen to advises and have been working on them.. and to prove it, I have attached my credit card statement below...

hahaha... I know I don't have to prove it to anyone, but I just want to capture and save this image of 'outstanding balance 0.00' cos I'm seeing this after YEARS and I don't know when will I ever get to see it again!

By: 'lilo


Its been some time since I went on a proper shopping... been controlling my urges due to my well known financial situation... but now that its diwali, I have a reason to shop! n even then, its not like I want to, its just that I don't wanna make my parents sad on diwali day seeing me wearing old clothes.. n it would also be a humiliation to them as we celebrate in big group with few families together.. so to save them them the humiliation and to make them proud, me being the goodie-two-shoes daughter is on a mission to shop this week ;)

even writing about 'shopping' makes me grin on a boring morning :D Shopping is indeed a therapy...

I went on a short-warm up shopping session yesterday before hitting the gym.. it was such pleasure... although I just bought some miscellaneous stuff, (i absolutely love all of them!!!) it made me so happy, relaxed and relieved... hahaha... n having my best shopping buddy joining me was an added pleasure! ;)

n I also had this greatest opportunity to become a/the privileged member of this most prestigious/pleasurable organization on earth, La Senza! What more can a girl ask for? ;)

By: 'lilo

Monday, 20 October 2008

when nothing i do is right - part II :(

and the jinx continues...

Monday hasn't even ended yet, and i get more news :(
1. i ate only a small bun for lunch and am hungry :(
2. after getting the new machine set up, i realized i forgot to save my sat's work progress as i backed up the files on friday night and didn't update
3. i also forgot to save my mmc file (the console that stored all my servers and other related servers)
4. best of all, my sister emails me to tell me that my mum's car (i usually drive this when she is not around or im going out) has 2 summons from the traffic police :(
1 for speeding in Putrajaya - which is definitely me, and another for breaking traffic light at KL - which is on a sunday..hence no idea whether its my sister or me)... Both amount to RM 500 :(

Oh, and i forgot to add this: during the bumper-2-bumper crawl this morning, my car 'kissed' a new Volvo S80... haha.. luckily the 'kiss' didn't leave its mark :P So yeah, and that is how my Monday started ...

can my week get any better? i don't think so :(

-M, staring out at the gloomy gloomy rain outside...

when nothing i do is right

I've had a tough, stressful and sad week last week and still counting...
It started off okay at first...Tried new route to workplace last week ....
Day 1: was fine and traffic was clear etc
Day 2: went to yoga after aeons and realized it aint easy to be flexible
and then the cursed days begun:

Day 3: smarting from the physical pain from above activity, work was getting shittier (read: horribly busy). Plus, finding out my so called extra 'help'/resource is pregnant (read: morning sickness, lack of work attitude etc etc), wasn't exactly helpful as i needed her work input crucially.. i am tired of the solo crusade.. but then again, i can't blame her :( top of that, my then best friend decided to be extra 'nice' to me and no prizes for guessing what i felt.. HURT!

Day 4: Had to go back on my own.. decided to try the new route as the road i usually travelled was in a jam (i actually checked on the radio website before leaving) and ended up not being able to find 1 small minor turning. Went on a roundabout thrice but couldn't figure out. How come? Well try adding factors like the torrential rain, darkness and my super weak+astigmated eyes..
Ended up taking 2 hours to reach home as the road i finally chose albeit is also an alternative way to reach my sodding home as that road was on a bumper to bumper crawl...
And to add more misery, the so called best friend was still oblivious and was being 'nice'...

Day 5: My machine started acting up and just like last friday, had to be remoted in for the helpdesk staff to try to fix it... wasted whole of morning half due to the problem and my work just got piled up to my neck..
In the end, the problem was only to be fixed if i choose to reformat the bloody machine...

Day 6 (the 'weekend'): Continued work from Friday... but the stupid wireless kept disconnecting intermittently and i had to VPN in to my work network each time... and really ruined my pace of work.. :(
Finally after 4 hours of non stop work, and the wireless acting up, i gave up and forced myself to go to KLCC to get my work shoes which are tattered by now and i have been putting off for ages... Bought some books at Kinokuniya and that cheered me up a bit...If anything, books don't hurt feelings and are my comfort pick me ups :)

Mum bought some Munchy's biscuits over to the living room and was saying how nice they were etc.. and that i should finish them.. so we ate & ate.. mostly i ate a lot..
Next day, it came out in the paper that very brand and the type (peanut butter flavour) had the most melamine content in it and was tested by Hong Kong authorities... haha.. :P
I missed my so called best friend then too... :( Where is a friend when you need one? :(

Day 7: Woke up early went to temple.. all was good.. and then later onwards decided to go online to face an ugly matter... things got only worse.. Ended up fighting and crying.. Made a fool of myself even :(
Cried myself to sleep

Day 8: Got up early as i wanted to go work early, get the machine reformatted and do work, work and work... got stuck in a bad crawl again... hence, all efforts to reach 'early' to office went to drain :(
Then my preggie mate comes up to me and says she is gonna leave home (read: she can't do the work i assigned her yet again)...
Eatin lunch at my desk now.. feet hurts coz i walked to the nearest petrol station to grab snack/food in my new shoes.. I don't think any1 walks to that place but i needed the walk...
The only good and 'lucky' thing that happened to me today is as soon as i was back at my desk, nursing the swollen feet, i saw it raining outside... thank goodness i didnt got caught in the rain while walking alone and umbrella-less :P

Lets see if the week gets worse.. after all, its only Monday YET :P


Thursday, 16 October 2008

Lilo wonders...

Lilo is very sleepy, tired n just simply restless.. none of her frens are online.. back from running a tiring event.. boss is sitting right next to her.. she needs to write.. she needs to blog... but what???

Since I wrote about pretenders n all that in my previous blog, it just reminded me that I met one yesterday.. He’s a long lost cousin of mine.. he is my cousin n he used to live in my house for a short period when I n him were much younger.. then he moved on with his life, never really kept in touch.. met once in a blue moon during diwali..

Yesterday, I bumped into him at the hotel I had my conference.. I recognized him n I’m pretty sure he didn’t.. being surprisingly nice, for once.. I said hi n asked if he remembers me… then I told him my name n he pretended like he always knew me… he right away said I was much fairer before hence he couldn’t recognize me… which I don’t think is quite true…

Anyway, he initiated a conversation although I’m pretty sure he didn’t know who I was.. It was kinda funny talking to someone when I know he’s just pretending.. (maybe he was just trying to be nice).. the smile running on my head while I was talking to him was proven, when he introduced me as his Niece to his colleague… I almost burst out laughing… I am his bloody cousin! :p

Then the next day while I was there.. he came looking for me n started a conversation again… he was playing very safe n asked some very generic questions… he insisted on getting me something… then he came back with two cakes for me to take back home.. saying he really misses my family etc… I was quite amazed and he proved it again, by asking if we are all still living at this place where we never lived before… not even close…

Yes, I agree his gesture was really sweet… but it just makes me wonder, do we really need to pretend to be nice? What is so wrong in not remembering someone? What is so wrong in saying I don’t know something? Why must people pretend to know something when they have no clue? Aren’t we all just human? And human make mistakes? And we don’t know everything?

By restless, ‘lilo

Tuesday, 14 October 2008

Phoney stuff

Margie needs a new cell... coz she hates her current K618i Sony Ericsson (sorry Anya!) :P

Anyway, after weeks of pondering (half-heartedly) on deciding the brand for the phone (it was a toss between Nokia or Samsung), she decided on Nokia based on:

1. The HIGH and POPULAR availability of these phones in the market
2. The easy support pre and post sales
3. Price factor (when functions are added in)
4. Ease of downloading themes, wallpaper etc.

Margie still and will always hold dear affection for Motorola phones but at this point, she needs a thingmajiggy that is envylicious + loaded with functions :D

So at first she was overwhelmed with the many models that Nokia.Com.MY has to offer (it can be mind boggling as some of the models featured, she haven't even heard of, let alone seen!) -->ok, pardon the ignorance, but how many of you have heard of this phone called Nokia 8800 Sirocco Edition, 8800 Luna, 8800 Carbon Arte, Nokia 7510 Supernova..anyone?

Anyway, once she was done gaping at the mouthful of choices, she saw the neat feature that the site had.. you just pick and choose what functions you want, the design etc.. and it will narrow down the choices for you.. smart eh? -->ok, so it's not rocket science but i seriously haven't surfed any phone sites in a LOOOONG time.. the last i surfed was a Moto site like last year :P and the last time i bought my 6260 Nokia was just after 1 day surfing and with no research what-so-ever.. I loved that phone but it dropped too many times and one day it just went into coma.period.

Ok, so her final pick are either:

1. Nokia E66 - RM 1,995 (sob, sob..too pricey for me) :(
2. Nokia 6600 Slide - RM 1,409
3. Nokia 6600 Fold - RM 1,619 -->i prefer this than the slide but the features in the slide are MORE plus, the price is cheaper too...

Next thing to do now is to surf up forums/blogs to know the +/- factors of each...

The comparation chart in the Nokia site does help a lot in terms of each specs etc.. but nothing beats the reviews from the end users itself :P


Monday, 13 October 2008

Why Margie wishes the fuel price goes UP again...

WHY do freakin Malaysians LOVE to stop/slow down and STARE at road accidents!!! esp when it doesn't concern them in any way!!!!

Stuck at bumper to bumper crawl today morning for nearly 2 hours is so NOT funny esp on MONDAY!!!!

All for what??

For an accident that happens miles away and (get this!) on the OPPOSITE road direction!!!!!! Which has NOTHING to do with the road that is backed up.... And sometimes this results in more accidents as the car in front brakes to get 'a good look' & the car at the back rams into the 'busy body' car... I have seen this happen many a times & yet people don't learn do they?

But alas, this happens ever so often till even the traffic reporters in the radio always say "stop slowing down to look people!!"


Margie thinks this is what she would do if she ever becomes the minister in Road ministry:

1. Hike up fuel price - and no, i can't care less if people can afford or can't.. most she sees driving to work are single occupants (so NOT environment friendly!!).. Less cars on the road, less traffic for Margie.. Hmph!

2. Show gruesome accident aftermath pictures on national tv, cable tv every single day at least once on peak airtime. - Malaysia is highest in road fatalities in Asia Pac (won't be surprised if 1st in the world too :P)

p/s: me thinks this way, with DAILY reminders of how one looks like after an accident (if lucky enough to be alive, that is), more Malaysians will start being cautious and courteous on the road.

Check this out: http://www.factbook.net/EGRF_Regional_analyses_AsiaPacific.htm

ok, so i know its outdated.. but think bout it, if that was for year 96, imagine now.. and we ALL know that accident rates in M'sia increases not decreases.

3. When accidents DO occur (despite step 1 &2 above), have the policemen YELL at every freaking slowing down motorist to GET MOVING & direct traffic...

OR if that doesn't work, have a BIG makeshift-mobile-projector screen put up depicting the accident scene so that the all important BUSY BODIES can SEE to their hearts content from miles away.

4. For every motorist that actually stops his car & parks at the emergency lane to go to the accident scene to 'get a better look and feel of the situation, without contributing much help anyways', have the policemen issue summons on them.

OR in my situation, i usually glare at them and honk with all contempt at these 'busybody- nobodies'.

5. Ban all heavy vehicles from using ANY road during rush hour traffic!!

Last but not least and which is the easiset and most sensible to apply is to HAVE A FREAKING DEPENDABLE, RELIABLE public transportation system. But of course, our government is run by a legion of u-know-whats to even care about any of this.

-Margie in Black Monday Mood :@

Thursday, 9 October 2008

A weird incident...

Recently I attended a function, quite a holy one. There was this small incident that caught my eyee and made me think. So I decided to write about it and get it out of my head. At least it would be different than the usual ramblings ;p

Anyway, this function was conducted by a group of people (i really don't know what are they called, will describe later) who run sort of a charity home.. This group of people, they only wear white clothes, they do not eat meat, they do lot of charity in the aim to bring the public closer to god; They are the people, who sort of have sacrificed their life in the name of god, charity, etc. And this group is led by a 'Guru' who is believed to be very special. Wiki says, A guru is a person who is regarded as having great knowledge, wisdom and authority in a certain area, and uses it to guide others. literally a preceptor who shows others knowledge (light) and destroys ignorance (darkness).

I have nothing against them or what so ever. What they are doing is indeed very honorable, respectable and something I would never ever be able to do. But somehow or rather, due to my own beliefs, I have never been their fan.

Anyway, so in the function, they did some performance, its called Bhajan actually. A Bhajan is a type of Hindu devotional song, often simple, lyrical and expressing love for the Divine. I do like bhajans. So they performed and the lead singer was the 'guru'.

During this, there was this small technical issue that caught my eyes. The microphone stand was placed not close enough to her, hence her voice wasn't very clear. So the immediate reaction of her shishya, her colleague, simply another member of the group who was next to her, took the microphone out from the stand and held it close to the guru's mouth. (ok now, do some exercise.. imagine a person is standing right next to you, shoulder by shoulder.. grab a mineral water bottle perhaps and raise your hand to your side.. try n see if you can even last a minute without feeling an inch of pain) Btw, this bhajan is for one hour long!

And I think, it wont take a scientist to guess this: One look at it, I know it would hurt. Terribly. If I was the singer, my immediate reaction, without thinking a second, would be to grab the microphone and hold it myself. Even if I am the King of a country, I really believe that is what I would do. Or at least, I would offer to do it. Initiate. Try.

But to my amazement, this so called 'guru', didn't move an inch. She didn't bother to ask, try or anything at all. She continued singing happily, as if nothing else in the world matters.

Maybe you think I am exaggerating, amplifying or being ridiculous over a tiny thing. But seriously. She is a 'Guru', who is believed to have special powers and has seen the light of divine, who has sacrificed her life for charity, but she don't even care a bit for her own group member; didn't have the courtesy to think, it would hurt him. (I watched her closely every second, not even once she initiated) And she's suppose to be saving the world?

I don't mean to be proud of myself or anything. But I think I should be proud that I have better morality than her. I would rather feed a poor child in front of my eyes than to be preaching about world peace and poverty.

At the end of the function, everyone who attended, including my mom, queued up to get her blessings. I headed straight to the place where they were serving FOOD! :)

By: 'lilo

Wednesday, 8 October 2008

Glass is half empty..

yes, i am one of those who sees the glass as half empty.. i am full of negative vibes.. many people have told me so.. i have had some lame attempts to see things more positively, but i just cant.. n sadly, i choose to agree that i am a negative person.. pessimist.. maybe i'm just made this way.. n my bf tells me, just be who you are.. there's nothing wrong with you...

honestly, if you would ask me what i like, i would take time to think.. but if you ask me what i hate instead, i would tell u immediately.. so i decided to compile a list of things that i hate...

1. FAKE people.. pretenders!
if i dont like u, i dont like u.. maybe i wont tell u that i dont like u, but i would definitely NOT fake it n be all smiling in front of u.. rather i would avoid myself from having anything to do with u!
if u had a bad hair cut, i will never say it looks good on u and laugh behind at ur back.. i wud rather just say, oh, you had a haircut and fullstop!

2. unprofessional LIARs!
yeah, i know honesty is the best policy and etc.. but i don't really mind lies.. BUT and absolute BUT, DO NOT ever lie if u don't know how to lie.. i really think nothing can be more embarrassing than having the person knowing that u r lying..

3. SLOW drivers!
i absolutely, with all my heart n soul, HATE those who hog the fast lane and drive slow.. and i hate them even more if they drive a better car than me!

4. Everyday-is-a-great day people!
you must be so blessed that everyday is a great day for u.. but i'm not that lucky.. so don't come in my way... n dont bother trying to make me see things ur way..

5. WHINE babies
as much as i hate cheerful creeps, i also hate those who just like to whine about anything and everything... like everyone else was born with silver spoon in their mouth..

well, this should be a new term... haha.. i just didnt know what to call those who always ask for advise, but never once would follow!! seriously, if you already made a decision up in ur head, don't bother asking me for advise..

i guess thats all for now...this should been called 'people' that I hate the most instead of 'things'.. I may write about those things another day.. well, yeah i do know, i'm hard to please, i can't expect everyone to be as stuck up as me, but hey, guess wat? i really DON'T care what you think :)


and just when i was compiling this list, another GREATMIND, who's so turning into me, (i do honestly pity her), posted a similar blog.. so don't be surprised, we are just spending too much time together ;p

Oh the joys of life!

I think I'm becoming too cynical lately and turning into a pessimist. Not that I was ever one of those people that grinned ear to ear proclaiming "Everyday is a great day!" even when they spill curry on their new white shirt and they have five deadlines to meet by the end of the day! At least I think I generally used to look on the bright side of life without being irratating.

But lately I've been realising that as the year comes to an end, I'm more likely to look at the glass as half empty rather than half full, compared to a year ago. So OK, no better time to change than now. I shall make a list of all the things I should be positive about!

1. PMS; bloating, cramps, mood swings, pain, cramps, mood swings, CRAMPS, PAIN. Hey, look on the bright side, I'm fertile! One day I'll be able to have my very own little bundles of terror.

2. Office politics; bitching, bitching and more bitching. Well, at least it means I'm employed. And I have a boss that drives me mad with his lame sense of humour.

3. Traffic jams; total waste of time, fuel and increases stress levels. But joy of all joys, it means I have places to go to and people to see! Whether I want to or not ....

4. Relatives; everyone has an opinion about everything, and some just want to run my life for me and the more relatives I have, the more soap opera dramas I get. But occasionally they manage to be fun and some are also around to help... but most need to be helped...

Right, I'm only at number 4 and I'm honestly giving my best shot to be chirpy but it's not really working is it? Maybe that's the problem, it's not about me being an optimist or pessimist, rather, it's about me being a realist. Be realistic, accept the facts and not sugar coat it with optimism or smear it with negativity.

Oww, who am I kidding? I'm about as bad as the "Carpe Diem! Everyday is a great day!" chanters:)


Monday, 6 October 2008

Ye 'Ol Dayz....

Been a long time since i last blogged.. but last night's discovery prompted me to :D

See, it all started with a nagging worry that i lost some of my pictures from Uni days and Sydney ones that lead me to start diggin up old burn CDs at home....

Voila, a quick search and i found few CDs... Some had my thesis work on it and some were just simply Pictures :D

Boy, was i happy to discover them or what coz i thought i lost most of them when my laptop when to my brother... and i made my sister delete ALL pictures (since i had pictures of me and my ex, not that they were bad pictures...but still.... my brother to see them? NO WAY HOZE!) hehe...

So, i stumbled upon some AMAZING pics of me and the JingBangs from the days when we were.... well.. i can't describe how we looked like then.. but one word that sums it up will be Loser? hahahhaa..

A picture speaks a thousand words they say.... and i know, i know, i am breakin the cardinal sin here by posting our pictures... but i think they are so necessary in this particular post, hence im throwing caution to the winds :D

Picture 1: All suckin... (this was the filename in fact!)

The place this was taken is the MOST used spot in the whole house and THE PLACE where all major events (in our sucky no-life) happened/happens or is discussed at = the throw pillows cum lazy-arsed-couchpotatoes-area :D

Picture 2: Pyscho P?

Do i really need to comment on this? "BBA" ;)

Picture 3: The LOSERS - this got me laughin so hard :D

this was when were in our 1st year... and no, altho we can't reveal who is who.. but i can tell u, that we don't look as bad as some of 'em in this pic... (sorry but i couldnt care less of those ppl we left back then) hehehe

and the cream of the crop is one pic of me running in my pyjamas... but unfortunately (or fortunately) i didnt copy it out from my CD last night... hence, it will have to wait...


p/s: Pictures have been removed due to reasons only known to the authors :P

Wednesday, 17 September 2008

...life goes on...

It's my last day in Panama and although it's a Tuesday, I feel like it's a Friday. Which translates to, I have some work to finish but I've got absolutely no mood :D

Since I came into the office, I've updated my Facebook with my pictures in Panama, read some stuff on Malaysia's never ending (pointless) politics on The Star and than I was wondering how to pass the time till 5pm... and I remembered our blog. Obviously everyone has been really busy lately to complain that life sucks :), so there hasn't been any new entries but anyway, I read through the blog entries since we started our blog. And I realised that, despite all the moaning and groaning and sulking and complaining... despite all the changes we had to grow through (as Albert Einstein said, 'the only constant in life is change')... life goes on...

.... I still have a b*t*h in my life, but I figured out a way to have minimal contact with her without being obvious about it...

.... I still get stressed out over work and people but it doesn't last forever...

.... I still am trying to decode my boss's coded language and figure out what his expectations are. I think I'm understanding him better, but I've still got a long way to go...

.... I've learnt that matters of the heart are complicated...

.... I still wish it was easier to find the perfect pair of jeans in Malaysia. So far all my favourite jeans have come from Central America. I think it's because they make it for other body types and not just the broom stick ones...

.... All of us had shitty times this year, but we've always had each other for support and those shitty times do eventually come to an end...

So quater-life crisis or mid-life crisis or whatever it is they call it these days, suck it up because life goes on ...


Tuesday, 26 August 2008

Off the beaten track

So, yes, I'm back in Kingston, Jamaica again! Although it's been work, work and even more work since I got here, how many people can actually say they have the view that I have from my hotel balcony while they work?

Anyway, last weekend, I got a well deserved break from work when my friend invited me to balik kampung with her. Her kampung is a little village on Constituition Hill, about 30 minutes away from Kingston. Getting there itself was an adventure on it's own. The roads were ridiculously narrow, one side was the mountain wall and the other was a steep drop into the valley. Amazingly enough, somehow it can actually fit 2 vehicles and I'm not talking about Kancil sized cars here, more like Hiluxes and Landrovers. Don't ask me how, I just didn't want to look how close we were from falling off the cliff.
The highlights of my little village adventure was the traditional home cooked food and a domino match that I went to.

A traditional Jamaican breakfast is Ackee and Saltfish(nice - looks and tastes like scrambled eggs) and Roasted Breadfruit(nice- tastes like not-so-sweet potato) and Boiled Banana(plain yucky!). Ackee is the national fruit of Jamaica and it can only be plucked off the trees once it has opened up by itself. If you eat an unopened Ackee, you'd be poisoned.

Ackee fruit

Jamaican breakfast
Now, the domino match. Did I say match? Nope. I should correct myself. It should be called Domino Kampung Cup. Every Sunday, the whole village gathers at a little shed to support their favourite domino team. Each team has it's own jersey, cheerleaders (complete with the team flag and banners), and everyone brings trumpets, lots of sticks and pots and pans that they can bang together and generally just make as much noise as they can on top of all the shouting to support their team.

A domino match
And how can I not mention the weed .... wow, lots and lots of weed! The men were smoking weed as commonly as you might find someone in Malaysia smoking cigarettes. By the time they finished their game, I had been at the match for about 2 hours and I was having a serious headache from inhaling secondary weed smoke. I was so glad to leave the place and breathe in fresh air!
So that was my little village adventure. It was off the beaten track - not a very "touristy" thing to do, considering I'm in the Caribbeans. But I actually appreciated this experience more than I would appreciate going to the beach because this is also Jamaica - the people and their culture. And I'm glad that the people opened up to me, welcomed me and showed me a little of who they are.
~Anya~ (now completely recovered from my secondary weed-smoke hang over) :)

Wednesday, 20 August 2008

Mother of all bad signs..

Recently I went on a short vacation to Cambodia ;) it was a very well deserved break and I honestly had a great time..

I was dreading this trip so much for all the “right” reasons.. (Note: its not wrong reasons) I think anyone in my position would have considered all the things that happened as a very bad sign and probably would have canceled the trip.. but im glad I didn’t :)

Well, the air tickets to go Cambodia was booked like 6 months back.. it all started there went I booked the flights to the wrong city, Phnom Penh.. because of that there was lot of confusion on how we gonna be traveling to the city I wanted to visit Siam Reap.. which is like 5-6 hours away from Phnom Penh..

Although we had the whole of 6 long months to prepare, being our great selves, we didn’t bother to prepare.. (also because we weren’t financially able to) I attempted to plan something and sort out the travel arrangements now n then.. due to lack of response from the other party, I just couldn’t be bothered at the end.. as we reached closer to the dates, I sort of gave up hope and was quite confident that this trip will not work out…

Only like 3 days before we were to scheduled to fly, we started getting serious bout this trip.. even then, we had a lot issues to consider, the biggest issue came from the financial sector.. after a lot of arguments and research and bla bla, we finally decided to go for it.. which was on Monday.. (we were suppose to fly on wednesday)..

Looking for a hotel at the very last minute, or I should rephrase, looking for an cheap/affordable hotel at the last minute was hard… I spent hours looking and finally on Monday night I booked it all n left home feeling relieved.. then I came to work on Tuesday, opened my inbox, and there were mails from the hotels I booked rejecting my booking… tat was a great start.. then I had to start the process all over again.. call up this n that, book this, book that, rush them on confirmation and finally on Tuesday night I managed to confirm the rooms… then I had to rush to KL to collect my camera and to change some money… I went to bank to withdraw money tat night, and the great atm machine retained my card for no good reason… bang! There I was with no money in hand and without my atm card…

Took a deep breath.. patiently left home.. woke up early next day, flyin in the afternoon.. went to the bank queued up long, and finally went my turn was up, the system was down... great! There I was again, with no money at all.. they told me try again in an hour.. Still didn’t loose my patience, I rushed to my office, to send out an important file, I went switched on my pc, was trying to get it done asap, n here we go… the office actually blacked out!!

Do you actually need any more bad signs? I did stop n think every time, if all this is a bad sign n I should just call off the trip… somehow we still wanted to go ahead…

By the time, I sort that out.. Rushed back to the bank to withdraw money n etc.. I was already running late to check in.. still rushed, took a cab to the airport and yeah guess wat.. the driver took a longer route n was driving extremely slow… by the time we reached, no prize for guessing, the check in counter was closed… although, we should have just shut up and came back, we didn’t.. and things actually started turning around well since then..

There was a kind lady at the counter who was willing to check us in… and the moment we landed, we were greeted by this sweet local guy, the driver, who was willing to take us to Siam Reap and show us around in his car for a cheap price since he had some work to do there… that solved all our traveling misery.. we checked into the 1st hotel, which I was dreading after reading some bad reviews, and to be told that our room was upgraded to VIP room because they were out of room and we got it for a standard room price… everything else were just falling into place, the right places, throughout the whole trip.. We were quite worried bout going to be penniless there.. But we actually managed to live a good life, spent on everything we wanted, did some good shopping and did come back with some money in hand and great smile on our faces…

So see… the moral of the story.. U never try, u never know… no sign is a bad sign :)

By: ‘lilo

Lilo missing her frens...

This blog is getting rather pathetic.. No one is contributing anything anymore.. I don’t know what happened to my quarter-life-crisised frens.. Lilo wonders if they have all gone past the stage, overcame the crisis n too happy with their life to be bothered about this blog.. or they are all just too busy with their life to waste their time complaining on this blog..

Anyway, just to update on behalf of them.. Margie is in Prague now.. having a blasting time.. doin a lot of ‘adventurous’ things ;) she would kill me if i name them, although im very tempted to..

Anya is on her way to panama.. currently in Jamaica.. watching the sea from her room window and missing certain someone in the east Malaysia..

Snowflakes who never appeared in this blog, is missing in action as usual.. the last I heard from her, she’s currently very busy with mommy-sitting ;p

so that leaves lilo all alone.. sucking on her oh-so-usual boring life..

By: ‘lilo

Wednesday, 16 July 2008

The F.O.U.R letter word!

wow, i just realised the word "four" actually have 4 alphabets in it.. ok, ok.. before u all think i have gone crazy, just try from one to ten, none of it actually represent the number of alphabets in it.. see, i have a point!

anyway, my intention was just to write about the significance of the four letter word in my life.. LIFE yeah, (the 1st 4 letter word) SUCK! (2nd) n my recent over used word is, FUCK! (3rd) although i was recently reminded by a friend not to over-use it, as its so not me, well, im so PISSed (4th) with everyone and everything right now.. n this phase that i'm going through in my life, as turned me to be real MEAN (5th).. maybe, i have always been.. nway, im glad to be mean rather than being a bitch!

n im also very COLD (6th) towards people.. i just cant go all smiling n make friends to everyone.. recently also been called stone cold :p with no emotions.. anyway, so at the end of the day, i always fall into the SNOB (7th) category...

talking about 4 letter words.. my name is one.. although im not gonna say it here, its the 8th one.. coincidentally my nick for this blog too is a 4 letter word.. LILO (9th).. n im actually dating a guy, who also has a 4 letter name (10th)...

n all my life, I always only had 4 friends at any one point of time in my life.. like, primary, secondary, uni n etc..

n the number I represent according to the numerology thing is actually 4 (1+3, 13 which is my birth day)

although the number 4 plays a big role in my life or at least lot of insignificant significance in my life.. number 4 is actually dreaded by a certain community.. they actually avoid this number in anything they do, like when buying car, house, no 4th floor in a building, n etc... because 4 in Chinese is pronounced as "SEI" which literally means DIE!

now, doesn't that explain myself very clearly??

By: 'lilo

Friday, 27 June 2008

Horns beneath my hallow

Yesterday a friend asked me this : “25 years of living, 10 of it you probably don’t remember much of – but the rest of the 15, have to ever done anything impulsive? Something exciting, dangerous and mischievous?” Something that when you look back, you smile and feel really happy about.

It could have been just a general question and I could have given a befitting general answer but somehow I just stopped to think. Really, in the past 25 years, do I have anything to look back on and say with awed satisfaction “Damn! I can’t believe I did that!” Or have I just gone with the flow and did what everyone says I should do or is the right thing to do. For instance, when the time came for me to make a decision about choosing what field to study in university (unfortunately I’m not one of those people who knew what they wanted to be since the age of three :P), I basically had 4 options : doctor, lawyer, engineer and accountant. Although my parents pretty much gave me the freedom to pursue anything I wanted, these four professions have always been the profession of choice among my community (especially doctor). Not wanting to disappoint my parents and grandparents and for lack of better options, I chose the lesser evil in my opinion and ended up in engineering.

Up to graduation, I have to say I just went along with “the right thing to do” which was to get that damn engineering degree! But once I was living the single, young working adult life, I have to say I’ve been discovering that I have little devil horns hiding beneath my hallow. So back to the question about have I done anything that was incredibly impulsive and mischievous- the little devil horns should give you a clue ;)



I can’t believe it has been a month since I last blogged… although I never failed to check on updates in this blog everyday, but I just didn’t have time to write one myself… I’ve been extremely busy and stressful; or rather life has been a bitch...

Work has been very stressful… lack of manpower, deadlines, new senior-ship, blur junior, everything is taking a toll on me..

And life, hell yeah, that has been pretty stressful too.. Lack of sleep, relationship, family, blocked credit cards, the hole in my wallet, zero bank balance, recent price hikes… oh yeah, lack of menstruation too.. (Counting to 4 months now)

But I guess this is what makes my life interesting.. Without all these, life would be so boring.. The truth is, I’ll be too free to think… when I think a lot, I analyze the tiny miny details, I deliberate on unwanted issues, I pick up fight over nonsense.. Conclusion, I end up being sad…

So here I am, extremely HAPPY..

~ happy that I have no time to even feel bored

~ happy that I have no time to pick a fight with my mom/bf

~ happy that I don’t have time to think how’s my future going to be…

:) ,


Wednesday, 4 June 2008

For Real or Fake?

Did I mention that the hotel I'm staying at now serves a weird buffet breakfast? It's a cross between western and local Jamaican food and somehow the result is just plain weird. But anyway, that's beside the point. What I really want to tell you about is what happened during breakfast this morning.

A French guy asked me out for dinner!

Ok, ok, I shouldn't get ahead of myself. So there I was, minding my own business, having my mandatory morning cup of coffee (there is no life before coffee. period.), when this guy walks up to my table and asks if he could sit with me. I gave him a blank stare, half my mind wondering if I've met him before and the other half wondering if he's a sales person. So he asked me again. This time I declined saying I was about to leave to work. Than he whips out his business card - United Nations!- (I'm thinking to myself : Ok, so aparently I'm supposed to be impressed but this is interesting : A Frenchie working for the UN in Jamaica asking if he could sit at my table, so let's see what he has to say) Now when I think back, I think it was his French accent and not his UN business card that made me agree for him to join me for coffee.

One minute we were talking about work and the pros and cons of traveling and the next he was asking if I have dinner at the hotel. Of course I knew what his next question would be, so I told him I usually have dinner with my friends; indirectly saying "No, I'm not going to have dinner with you". And I have to give him credit, he actually got the subtle let down. He gave a laugh and said (in that nice French accent) "I was about to ask you out for dinner but anyway, how about you give me your business card instead?". Of course, I tactfully said no. French or not, somethings are better to be nipped in the bud.

Later, after he left, I looked at his business card again and something caught my eye. His e-mail address. It was a Yahoo e-mail address. Now, I may be wrong, but wouldn't someone who works for the UN have a UN e-mail address?

So was he really working for the UN, assigned to Jamaica on some important mission? Was he even really French? Or was he just a big fake?


Friday, 30 May 2008

Perfect Stranger..

We spent half (3/4 in my case) of our lives at office or school, but we could never get along with the people who we spent most of our time with. They simply play no significance in our lives that we tend to forget them, the moment we step out of the zone. But its amazing, how we suddenly bump this one new strange person and we get the feeling like we have known them all our lives and we would feel so safe to share all our life secrets.

I bumped into one recently.

I am not sure if I have mentioned this before in my previous posts, I am a very reserved person. I don’t make friends easily. I have never had more than 4 friends at any one point of time. Though this group of 4 friends changed gradually from primary to secondary to uni, but I have always been very attached to this friends. These are the people who know me like the back of their hand.

I can never start a conversation with a stranger. I could remain without speaking a word even if I’m jailed with a stranger for days if I want to. The best effort that I always make when I’m in a similar situation is to fake a smile. You know the kind of smile where you try to stretch your face muscle to reach the ears and it immediately returns to its original position in a split of second. Yeah, that’s the one. I’m constantly called or named snobbish for behaving in such away. But seriously, it’s something beyond my control. That’s my nature.

Anyway, back to my story. Yeah, I bumped into this one guy recently. I just had an opportunity to spend some time with him for merely 2 days. What surprises me till now is, I really don’t know I got along so well with him in those 2 days. Amazingly there was no ice to break, we just talked and talked and talked and became good friends. Just to stress the fact, there wasn’t any flirting involved, no sparks, no chemistry; it was a pure, platonic relationship. At the end of the 2 days, we were actually sitting at a corner of a road, eating ice cream, sharing our little secrets and laughing our hearts out.

He’s gone to wherever he came from. But I’m still amazed that I met him.

By: ‘lilo

Tuesday, 27 May 2008

Evolution part II

technology has evolved so much that im actually blogging from my mobile.. N d best thing is, it doesnt cost me a cent to do it :) i still remember our uni days, where 1st we were restricted by service providers to send sms to certain numbers.. Then we had to restrict ourselves from sending a sms considering d amount we paid..
Its amazing to think back how we actually survived during those time.. It sounds so ice age now..
Im right now at ritz carlton, calling my bf at india to make sure he has woke up, blogging, n facebooking on my mobile..
Just to rewind back few years of my life, i was at a stucked up place called skudai, shouting at my friends room windows asking wats for lunch n saving that one sms cost n constantly dealing wit tongkangs :p
Im sure my frens will laugh reading tis :)

Friday, 23 May 2008

Career Crossroad


I never thought it will be this hard!!!

Yesterday, as per my previous blog entry.. i got first-hand talk on what is going to happen in my department and the organization next week from a very senior and a dear colleague of mine.

Basically i got offered a new role in a new team (to be formed next week) with a new boss (who is the nicest boss i've known and respect greatly).

All exciting right? Wrong!!

That's cos as of March 2008, i have already decided once and for all (or so i thought) that i will leave LHD and i started applying.. And although i still have a looong list of companies i have yet to apply, i did managed to secure 2 companies interested in hiring me over the past month. Nothing great but better than nothing lah :)

So anyway, on Monday this week, i turn down one offer coz i was eagerly waiting another offer which i thought will be offered to me in 2-3 weeks IF im successful.

And today, just before lunch time, i get a call from that place offering me. The even dangled the "team lead" role in front of me, though the package is good overall but i think we can work on that.. ;-) But i had to be honest with them and i told them about my current situation at work, my future role and future team change and possibly another raise..

The guy was nice enough to tell me they can work on the package still.. (yet another carrot) :P

And then just as i was back from lunch, the manager approaches me again to have a chat.. He tells me more details. And then he says, my allowance, my raise etc can be fixed within a matter of days once the official announcement is out next week.

Since this was my mentor-friend, i told him some parts about my offer just hours before.. We had a looong talk and in the end he says "You need to do wishful thinking over the weekend".

He is right, i shouldn't be swayed by 'carrots dangled' but at the same time, im not even sure if im ready to lead people! I am ambitious and i tend to want things fast but how fast is good enough??

By Wednesday, i need to give my answer to the other company and by Tuesday to my current workplace..

I never thought i'll come to my very own 'major career crossroad' such as what im facing today... :( i am so at a loss..

Oh the pains of growing up!! Arrgh..

Going Mad,